How The Voices In Your Head Can Hold You Back

I heard a great story this week that has had my wheels turning ever since.  I’m going to share it with you in a minute.

But first, I want you to consider how you talk to yourself – in your head.  I think I’ve heard someone call this self-talk.


Photo by David Meier

The way I talk to myself holds me back all the time.  My first couple of years in commercial real estate, it held me way back.  I would talk myself out of making a call.  I would decide for a prospect that they weren’t interested…before I made the call.

This self-talk makes a difference.  What does the talk in your head sound like?  Consider this story.

A rich oil sheik decided he wanted to learn how to play golf.  So he built one of the world’s best golf courses.  It was perfect – gorgeous.

The sheik then invited a US club pro to spend two weeks with him on his new golf course giving him lessons. The pro accepted the invitation.

So the Sheik sent his private jet to collect the pro and bring him to the Middle East.  Once there, the pro spent two weeks in complete opulence.   Everything that he could have wanted was available to him.

The pro loved the course and very much enjoyed teaching the Sheik.

After 2 weeks, the pro was boarding the private jet to go back to America.  The Sheik, being very pleased with his two weeks of lessons, offered the pro anything.

The pro responded and told the Sheik that this had been the best 2 weeks of his life.  His hospitality and generosity were payment enough.

The Sheik insisted, asking the pro if he collected anything.

The pro responded that he collects golf clubs and then boarded the jet.

The entire flight home to the United State, the club pro thought about what the Sheik would do with that information.  Would he send him a diamond encrusted pitching wedge?  A gold-plated driver?

Over the next couple of weeks, the pro anxiously watched the mail.  He just knew the Sheik would be sending him a package that would blow his mind.

Then one day, the pro received an envelop in the mail from the Sheik.  Somewhat disappointed, he tore into the envelope and pulled out a letter.  He was looked at a deed to a 500 acre golf course.

A golf club.

Kings think differently than we do.

So here is my challenge to you this week.  What would be possible if you got out of your own way?  Consider the one prospect on your unicorn list – the one you are petrified to call.  Now quit talking yourself out of it.  Go bag the unicorn!

Think like a king this week!

Question: What are you going to go after this week? What could be possible if you refused to listen to the fear? You can leave a comment by clicking here.

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Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

  • David Monroe

    Great post Bo. You drove the ball right down the fairway on this post, pun intended. I would decide not to make calls to larger clients because the thoughts in my head would tell me; I don’t enough experience, your marketing package isn’t good enough, you aren’t ready to present to a board…

    So I hope the next post will be how to shut these voices up… Now I sound crazy, which may be true. How many golf courses have I left on the table?

    All the Best
    David Monroe
    Multifamily Director
    Bellator Apartment Group

    • David – I dig the pun. 🙂

      I don’t know how to shut the voices up. I’d say to just ignore them and then replace them with the truth. The truth is…you can!